Member-only story
Four things I wish I’d learned about men earlier in life
“If a man really, really wants to be with you,” said my mother several decades ago, “he will make every effort to communicate and/or be with you. You will be his priority.”
Naturally my eyes probably glazed over with sheer boredom — as they usually did while she was dispensing her pearls of wisdom (many of which proved to be correct, though I’m STILL debating whether the above quote is actually true). Boredom combined with disbelief, because for whatever reason my very young self had an incredibly difficult time imagining that such a male actually existed. Flash forward several years to my so-called middle-aged self and, after many years in the dating pool, I still debate whether such a man lives, in this day and age. I guess I’m just too accustomed to being in what people nowadays are calling “almost relationships” and rationalizing away the poor/neglectful/abusive/or just plain avoidant behavior o the men with whom I became involved.
As a long-time divorced woman I have dated a number of men who weren’t exactly in my ballpark (or anywhere near it, come to think of it). As a result, I have many stories — good, bad and indifferent —written in my book of life on the adventures of Relationship Land. A lot of women, including myself, have “settled” because of the subtle and not-so-subtle pressure to be part of couple, and…
