(the) longer you’re with a wrong or toxic partner, the more you’ll lose and hate yourself.

— — — — — —

The above quote is soooooo true and definitely worth noting. Love this article!!!

I know all too well from years of “looking for love in all the wrong places” and I’m sure many other readers can relate.

Too many people are searching for love--or a reasonable facsimile-- for the wrog reasons.

Many people (including myself) are wounded souls looking for someone to heal our hurts …when we should actually be looking within and soothing/loving ourselves.

I DO know the hell of “wrong person” as I’ve been with a few (and married, and quickly divorced, one who was totally wrong for me as well). Many of these men were abusive in one way or another and most had alcohol dependency issues as well …We go with what we know, I’ve heard. In other words, we re-create what we learned in our family of origin as “normal” … whether or not it’s actually good for us.

Unfortunately I believe us wounded souls may have an “S” (for Sucker) on our foreheads that certain others--usually toxic and/or awfully incompatible persons--can see. Then they move in on us with their charms and “positive” attention until we are hooked. To help avoid this we need to do the work on ourselves that will change the letter in our forgets from “S” (for Sucker) to “W” for Winner.

It took me 30-some years to learn this and I’m moving forward. Maybe other people can learn earlier and seek help, if they see themselves in this pattern.

Great article, Ellen!!! One that so people need to read and heed… for their own good/emotional well-being, and happier lives. Cheers!


Experienced professional writer/freelancer and former newspaper reporter-turned-online writer/blogger. Thinker. “Old soul”, young hippie, empath.

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